Revealing your private thoughts and struggles to a new stranger, even a professional, can feel daunting. This article examines individual therapy for adults rather than couples therapy or therapy for children. Let's explore some helpful factors to take into account as you begin your search. First, start by asking yourself:
What's My Problem?
It may seem absurdly self-evident, but being able to identify and clearly communicate the troubling and disruptive emotions you're experiencing is key. It will empower your doctor to help in a way that comprehensively takes into account your needs and focuses on altering negative behavior patterns. Underscoring this point, “Therapists aren't psychics,” says psychologist Dorothea Lack, a member of the American Psychological Association and in private practice in San Francisco. "It's essential for you to explain your own goals and expectations so you can get a sense of whether or not you and she are on the same page."
Certain aspects of a problem may reveal themselves over time, along with additional related information, but going in, it's best to know exactly what you want the outcome of therapy to be.
Go for the Most Cost-Effective Care
Don't compromise on a quality connection; you just may have to do a more intensive search for a therapist who meets your budget. Make sure the therapist is licensed. As for where he or she earned a degree (or degrees), an Ivy-league education doesn't guarantee that a therapist is right for your needs, but the information is valuable to have. Psychology Today magazine has a directory where you can search for therapists across a spectrum of specialties, and it lists their credentials.
Affordability
Not all therapists take insurance, but some offer a sliding scale in which you pay what you can afford. Fortunately, a relatively short, customized and client-targeted course of treatment can be of equal if not greater benefit than prolonged therapy. When you find a few promising prospects, apply the same qualifying criteria to all prospects regardless of cost.
Are They Couch Veterans Themselves?
You want a therapist who's been in therapy to ensure the therapist's personal issues don't interfere with his or her ability to view and treat yours objectively. Psychotherapist Drew Coster writes on his blog, “I found that 18 months of therapy changed me and defined who I became for the rest of my life. Since then, I’ve been a strong advocate for therapists having therapy, and I always stand by the belief that I could never ask my clients to do something that I wouldn’t be prepared to do myself. “
Set Up the Interview
It's important to have a brief consultation with the therapist on the phone or at the therapist's office to determine if going forward with a course of treatment with him or her feels like the right fit. Are you comfortable with the therapist's style and how he or she expresses himself or herself? For example, a clinician who speaks so softly you need to strain to hear may be a problem. Is he or she is too aggressive for your taste? Most important: Do you feel heard, understood and treated with respect?
Clinician Gender Preference
There's no need for internal political correctness when making your decision. If you're a woman and would prefer a male therapist or vice versa, go with the most comfortable choice. It's unlikely you'll be able to get the most out of what therapy can offer if you're not at ease with the person in the other chair.
So...You've Done This Before, Right?
You don't go to a car mechanic to get your teeth cleaned, and you don't go to the dentist to have your car fixed. You want a specialist whose bank of knowledge includes your issue.
Psychotherapists often use cognitive behavioral therapy techniques because they are practical methods to manage emotions such as anger and grief and cope with stressful life situations related to work, the fallout from abuse or loss, or the daily impact of living with a disease.
Cognitive behavioral therapy is also used to help people communicate effectively with themselves as well as others. It's highly goal-oriented and serves in identifying the beliefs you have surrounding your struggle. "CBT is a short-term, goal-directed treatment focused on the here and now," Lack said. One challenging aspect of this form of therapy involves examining your thought patterns and how you behaviorally and emotionally respond to a situation. The result helps to clarify whether a given situation is the true source of difficulty or rather your thoughts about it.
It's Not All Talk -- Therapy Takes Work
As stated on the American Psychological Association's website, “Psychotherapy is a collaborate effort between an individual and a psychologist.” When going through a challenging period, feeling angry or frustrated at the thought of having to exert yourself more, even for your own benefit, is only natural. But it's necessary to bring about meaningful change. Your therapist can offer constructive feedback, including insight into yourself and people around you, along with what might be fueling choices and behaviors standing in the way of you leading a happier and more productive life. That may include homework assignments where you strive to become more aware and practice what you've learned. From there, it's on you to put practice into action.
The Convenient Choice May Not Be the Best One
Real change may be just around the corner, but the clinician you can find it with may not be. During a stressful period, it's tempting to make your first choice the therapist down the block to acquire commute-free guidance. Although it's possible you may make a match, consider if making a bit of a time and travel investment is worth it for the right kind of counseling.
In the final analysis, so to speak, choosing a compatible, supportive, empathic and effective therapist takes a combination of research, communicating your needs and trusting your gut.