So how do you change this? Dr. Karen Sargent revealed a number of helpful tips on TinyBuddha.com. The first of these is to notice when these questions arise. She says that rather than actually hearing the question, one may feel a loss of hope. This can be an indicator that the question itself isn’t healthy. Second, explore what goes along with this thought process when questions like these arise. Third, take the time to ask: “Is this question or statement helping me move forward?” This can teach you a lot about the question itself. Fourth, if you feel that the answer is no, ask yourself, “What question can I replace it with that will help me move forward?” This general process will help you to wade through a nasty case of the “what ifs.”
3. Beating Ourselves Up
OK, you screwed up. However, whatever you did is in the past. You can’t change what happened yesterday. The only thing you can change is what you do today. This is why beating yourself up is not a good thought process to engage in.
This concept can apply to many things -- from slipping up on a diet to sex with an ex. It can even apply to failing to stick to a new exercise routine. So realize what you did wrong (if anything) and move on. Life isn’t about being perfect. It’s about learning along the way.